"Real Marriage" begins at The Bridge Sunday

You don’t need a new spouse; you need to be a new spouse.

This week at The Bridge we begin a new series called, "Real Marriage." For the next six weeks we will look at Biblical marriage, friendship, conflict and our responsibility in view of the Gospel. The Gospel declares that you can have a new marriage with the same spouse; you can defeat Satan in your life and marriage by the blood of the Lamb (Rev. 12:11).

Join us this week for, "New Marriage, Same Spouse" as we look at Ephesians 5:21-33.

Series Preview:
April 15 - "New Marriage, Same Spouse"
April 22 - "Friends with Benefits" - friendship
April 29 morning - "Man Up"
April 29 night - "A Tall Glass of Toilet Water" aka the porn path
May 6 - "The Respectful Wife"
May 13 - "Taking out the Trash" - conflict
May 20 morning - "Sex: God, Gross, or Gift?"
May 20 night - "Rid of My Disgrace" aka dealing with abuse

If you are single and considering skipping out on the next six weeks of the "Real Marriage" series to read Lamentations, please reconsider. 9 out of 10 singles statistically will marry. This is great prep work. Also the teaching on friendship, conflict, idols, and seeing how to openly deal with repentance and confession is well worth it.

Also, there are weekly questions for singles in the cell study who choose to go through it.

I love you all whether you are married, once married, or single!

"A Call to Prayer" Follow-UP

Hey Bridge Family, I hope you are enjoying this very warm week! Please make some time to go outdoors on a prayer walk this week.

This past Sunday I shared five lessons involving prayer from our text in Mark 11. They were:

1) Remember - the historical component
2) Trust God - the theological component
3) Believe - the spiritual component
4) Ask - the practical component
5) Forgive - the moral component

I also promised to share a few tips on praying according to God's will. Here are a few tips to help guide your way below.

Remember: Man's highest aim should be to bring glory to God (1 Corinthians 10:31), and this includes praying according to His will. First, we must ask for wisdom. “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him” (James 1:5). In asking for wisdom, we must also trust that God is gracious and willing to answer our prayers: “But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt” (James 1:6; see also Mark 11:24). So, praying according to the will of God includes asking for wisdom (to know the will of God) and asking in faith (to trust the will of God).

Here are seven biblical instructions that will guide the believer in praying according to God’s will:

1) Pray for the things for which the Bible commands prayer. We are told to pray for our enemies (Matthew 5:44); for God to send missionaries (Luke 10:2); that we do not enter temptation (Matthew 26:41); for ministers of the Word (Colossians 4:3; 2 Thessalonians 3:1); for government authorities (1 Timothy 2:1-3); for relief from affliction (James 5:13); and for the healing of fellow believers (James 5:16). Where God commands prayer, we can pray with confidence that we are praying according to His will.

2) Follow the example of godly characters in Scripture. Paul repeatedly prayed for the churches he planted and the salvation of others (read the pauline letters). David for example prayed for mercy and forgiveness when he sinned (Psalm 51:1-2). The early church prayed for boldness to witness (Acts 4:29). These prayers were according to the will of God, and similar prayers today can be as well. As with Paul and the early church, we should always be praying for the salvation of others. For ourselves, we should pray as David prayed, always aware of our sin and bringing it before God before it hinders our relationship with Him and thwarts our prayers.

3) Pray with the right motivation. Selfish motives will not be blessed by God. “When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures” (James 4:3). We should also pray, not so our lofty words can be heard and we may be seen by others as “spiritual,” but mostly in private and in secret, so that our heavenly Father will hear in private and reward us openly (Matthew 6:5-6).

4) Pray with a spirit of forgiveness toward others (Mark 11:25). A spirit of bitterness, anger, revenge or hatred toward others will prevent our hearts from praying in total submission to God. Just as we are told not to give offerings to God while there is conflict between ourselves and another Christian (Matthew 5:23-24), in the same way God does not want the offering of our prayers until we have reconciled with our brothers and sisters in Christ.

5) Pray with thanksgiving (Colossians 4:2; Philippians 4:6-7). We can always find something to be thankful for, no matter how burdened we are by our wants or needs. The greatest sufferer that lives in this world of redeeming love, and who has the offer of heaven before him, has reason to be grateful to God.

6) Pray with persistence (Luke 18:1; 1 Thessalonians 5:17). We should persevere in prayer and not quit or be dejected because we have not received an immediate answer. Part of praying in God’s will is believing that, whether His answer is “yes,” “no,” or “wait,” we accept His judgment, submit to His will, and continue to pray.

7) Rely on the Spirit of God in prayer. This is a wonderful truth: “We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will” (Romans 8:26-27). We have the Spirit’s help in praying. At the times of our deepest depression or sorrow, those times when we feel that we “just cannot pray,” we have the comfort of knowing that the Holy Spirit is actually praying for us! What an amazing God we have!

What assurance we have when we seek to walk in the Spirit and not in the flesh! Then we can have confidence that the Holy Spirit will accomplish His work in presenting our prayers to the Father according to His perfect will and timing, and we can rest in the knowledge that He is working all things together for our good (Romans 8:28).

Quotes on Prayer from some greats of our Faith:

"You may as soon find a living man that does not breath, as a living Christian that does not pray.” - Matthew Henry

"I would rather teach one man to pray than ten men to preach.” - Charles Spurgeon

"If I fail to spend two hours in prayer each morning, the devil gets the victory through the day. I have so much business I cannot get on without spending three hours daily in prayer.” - Martin Luther

"The most important thing a born again Christian can do is to pray." - Chuck Smith

"Don’t pray when you feel like it. Have an appointment with the Lord and keep it. A man is powerful on his knees." - Corrie ten Boom

"No learning can make up for the failure to pray. No earnestness, no diligence, no study, no gifts will supply its lack." - E.M. Bounds

"Satan trembles when he sees the weakest Christian on his knees." - William Cowper

"Prayer will make a man cease from sin, or sin will entice a man to cease from prayer." - John Bunyon

“The man who mobilizes the Christian church to pray will make the greatest contribution to world evangelization in history.” - Andrew Murray

"As is the business of tailors to make clothes and cobblers to make shoes, so it is the business of Christians to pray." - Martin Luther

“Prayer is where the action is." - John Wesley

Verge Highlights

I traveled to Austin, TX this past week for the Verge Conference. After each day I put into my journal key thoughts that stuck with me. I figured I should share them. Enjoy.

Day 1:

1. We need skilled business men chasing after Jesus
2. Always check the ROI (return on investment) in missions endeavors
3. People are packing into cities globally
4. We are living in a "fatherless" generation
   
5. Church = the family of God in the neighborhood
6. Listen. Receive vision. Respond. Lead passionately. Operate in gifts/talents.
7. Do not miss out on what the eternal God created us to do.
   
8. Labor in prayer
9. Incarnate into your culture, not another. Don't be afraid to create a better culture as well
   
10. Focus on those you want others to imitate. 20/80 rather than 80/20
11. We need to be blessers.
    
12. Who have you blessed this week?
    
13. Love is the only thing that can sustain mission.
14. You must develop a Christ-like agony for people
15. Christians live with a lot of unbelief
16. We must believe the truth of God
17. The Father is relentlessly pursuing you
    
18. There is a hipness in going. Jesus dwelled for thirty years with little notice.
    
19. Vanderstelt -- Stay. Among. Die.
    
20. What will help others perceive the Glory of God?

Day 2 -

1. Ephesians 4:7-11 is needed
2. You are perfectly designed to achieve what you are currently achieving
   
3. Engage in the suffering
4. We can not be on mission without prayer
5. Mission without prayer is works righteousness --- this was my thought
   
6. God can do more than we can
7. Cultivate the life of your own soul
8. Authenticity is the apologetic of our day
9. The church is a family, not an orphanage
10. Lean into the power of the Holy Spirit
11. Create space for the Holy Spirit
12. Disciple makers produce disciple makers
13. Spend time with the few to reach the many
14. Allow the few access into your life
15. Keep asking God for receptive people
16. If you can teach it to a child you know it. If you can't, you don't.
    
17. Prepare a 1 minute testimony. Encourage everyone to do this, practice this, hold them accountable.
18. Questions: Who did you witness to? Who did you train?
    
19. The 8 non-negotiable David Platt teachings... 1) God-centered God. 2) Word saturated ministry. 3) A life changing Gospel. 4) Spirit empowered church. 5) Christ-Driven Strategy. 6) A peoples focused goal. 7) A multi-faceted approach. 8) Death defined commitment
    
20. The great commission can be accomplished.
    

Teaching notes: Christ Centered Worship at Man Up

Here is a peak of my teaching notes on Christ-Centered Worship from the Man Up family night of worship. This is just the form/structure/guide and not everything I actually taught. Maybe you can still pull some nuggets out of it.

Christ-Centered Worship
Man Up Family Night of Worship
Benjamin Durbin
Colossians 3:1-17

Key Truth #1: Everyone worships something

One of my greatest fears is that God would look at our events, our services, and our lives and proclaim this passage from Matthew 5:18

"'This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far from me; in vain do they worship me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.'" Matthew 15:8-9

Would he look at us and say they pray, they sing, and they preach for nothing. It is vain. Empty?

The Big Question
What is my heart supposed to be doing so that the preaching and singing is not in vain?
Or
What turns all of life into worship?

The Answer:
Being satisfied with all that God is for us in Christ!

Key Truth #2: Right worship comes from a heart position that magnifies Christ

"If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory." - Colossians 3:1-4

Key Truth #3: When you see your position in Christ, you will worship

1) I died with Christ. vs. 3
2) I live with Christ vs. 4
3) I am raised with Christ vs. 1
4) I am hidden in Christ. vs. 3
5) I am glorified in Christ vs. 4

The life of a Christ-Centered Worshiper
In view of my wonderful identity in Christ,
I seek and set my heart and mind on things above.


Key Truth #4: I am dead, so I put to death the earthly.

"Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming. In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all."

Key Truth #5: The opposite of right worship is idolatry

Worship Distortions
Pleasure
Power
Pride
People

Key Truth #6: I am alive, so I bring to life the heavenly

"Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God." - Colossians 3:12-16

Note how many things we do TOGETHER in this passage
Note the variety of expressions: teaching, admonishing, psalms, hymns, spiritual songs.

Key Truth #7: Worship is all of life

"And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." - Colossians 3:17

Worship is continuous in the everyday activities of life

We do not simply go to the church for worship. It is just as much about how we live when we are not gathered.

But as continuous worshipers, we do gather ourselves together to continue our worship, but now in the context of our family in Christ.

Key Truth #8: The way to worship is falling madly in love with Jesus.

Worship is responding to God for who He is, what He has done, and what He is doing.

"And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience- among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ-by grace you have been saved- and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus." - Ephesians 2:1-7

Haiti Teaching - Spiritual Gifts

I will be teaching a group of pastors while in Haiti next week. Take a peak at some of my notes if you would like.

The Gospel of Mark Overview

The Gospel of Mark

Scratch Notes

This is the story of Jesus and His life.

Mark’s gospel highlights action over teaching, which leaves us with the impression of a dramatic story.

Mark’s favorite word is “straightway, or immediately.”

Again and again, Mark cuts to a different camera shot. Like a fast-paced movie, Mark keeps the interest of his readers.

Compared to the other gospels, Mark does not contain much teaching. Luke’s gospel includes twenty-five parables, Matthew has twenty parables, Mark has only seven. However, Mark’s accounts of events and teachings are vivid, and sometimes even more vivid than the other gospels.

Many of the details found in passages such as: Mark 6:30-34, 7:31-37, 8:22-26, 9:14-29 are not found in the other gospels even if the stories themselves are present. This leads me to think the book recounts what Peter remembered from the events. It has sort of an eye-witness feel.

Who wrote Mark?

A: Peter is the source. John Mark wrote it down.

The late first and early second century church leader Papias, who knew the disciples themselves, said that mark wrote down everything the apostle Peter told him about the sayings and deeds of Jesus. This is an idea the NT supports. John Mark first became associated with Peter when Peter was freed from prison and went to the home of Mark’s mother in Acts 12:12. Peter later mentioned that mark was with him in 1 Peter 5:13.

Many think that the fleeing figure in Mark 14:50-52 was actually the young John Mark and that this is kind of his signature in the book.

According to tradition, Mark wrote down Peter’s account near the end of Peter’s ministry in Rome.

STRUCTURE:

Mark contains the quickest beginning of any of the Gospels.

It begins by saying this is the good news.

Mark jumps right into the ministry of John the Baptist. By 1:16 Jesus is already calling his first disciples.

Chapters 1 – 8 provide a record of Jesus’ ministry in Galilee, where he established himself as a teacher and miracle-worker

A turning point occurs in Chapter 8 when Peter confessed that Jesus is the Messiah. After this confession Jesus focused more intently on his closest followers. He warns of his coming death /resurrection, and taught them about the cost of following him. Chapter 8-10 continues this focus and teaching as they travel towards Jerusalem.

Chapters 11 – 13 contain Jesus’ teaching in Jerusalem over the last week of his life.

Chapter 14 contains the Last Supper, Jesus’ betrayal, arrest, and arraignment before the Sanhedrin.

Chapter 15 describes his appearance before Pilate, his conviction, his being mocked, as well as his crucifixion, death, and burial.

Chapter 16 then provides a brief account of Jesus’ resurrection.

Mark records honestly how people responded to Jesus

Mark 3:20-21 – Jesus’ own family wanted to have him committed. [no dressing up Jesus here to make him look better—his family thought he was crazy.]

1) Some believed he was the messiah

-The friends of the paralyzed man in 2:5

-The bleeding woman in 5:34

-Jairus in 5:23

-Syrophoenician Woman in 7:29

-Blind Bartimaues in 10:52

-The Roman centurion at the cross 15:39

2) Some were confused

-You would think the disciples would be among those who believed, but they are portrayed throughout the gospel as confused and slow to learn.

-Note Jesus’ responses to them in 4:13, 4:40, 6:37,52, 6:49-0, 7:18, 8:16-21.

-The disciples didn’t understand Jesus’ teaching about his death and resurrection in 9:10

-They were shocked by his teaching on wealth and heaven in 10:22-27

-They fought over their comparative importance in 10:35-45

-They rebuked people when they brought their children to Jesus in 10:14

-Mark is clear: the disciples were confused and slow to learn.

3) Some were antagonistic

-Some clearly understood what Jesus was saying, and they opposed him.

-The teachers of the law charged him with blasphemy in 2:7

-The Pharisees objected to his eating with sinners and his statements about the Sabbath (2:16,24)

-The Pharisees and Herodians began to plot to kill Jesus in 3:6

-Jesus’ family thought he was crazy in 3:21

-The teachers of the law said he was demon possessed in 3:22,30

-The Gerasenes asked him to leave their region in 5:15-17

-His hometown residents were offended by him 6:4-5

-Herod worried about him 6:16

-The Pharisees kept challenging him 7:5

-The chief priests and the teachers of the law joined the Pharisees and Herodians in the conspiracy to kill Jesus in 11:18

-They challenged him publicly in 11:23-33. His response exposed their intentions in 12:1-11

-The liberal Sadducees take their turn at him in 12:18-23

-The plotting continued in chapter 14:1-2

-When Judas decided to help these conspirators in 14:10-11, the whole story turns in a tragic direction.

-The opposition engulfed Pharisees, Sadducees, Jews, Gentiles, foes and even friends.

A note on the “messianic secret”

Throughout the first half of Mark’s gospel, Jesus occasionally attempted to hide his identity as the Messiah (1:25, 1:34, 1:44, 3:12, 4:11-12, 5:39, 5:43, 7:36, 8:26, 8:30). Why? I think it was a teaching method.

Possibly His purpose was to shield himself from the attention of the crowds long enough to teach the disciples what the Messiah had really come to do. He was reeducating them and pointing them to particular scriptures that taught about the Messiah but had gone unnoticed. We see in 9:30-31 that after his Transfiguration that he left with the disciples and didn’t want anyone to know where they were so he could teach them. Once the disciples were reeducated, the “messianic secret” evaporated. We see Jesus is teaching publicly who he is in chapter 12.

What was this secret that led first to confusion and then to opposition? It is the centerpiece of Mark’s Gospel: the truth about who Jesus is.

Jesus on Jesus

If you listen to Jesus’ own words in Mark’s Gospel, you will find he did teach about matters of morality. However, that is not mainly what he taught about. The main thing he taught about was himself.

Except for the name Jesus, the title “son of man” is the most frequent phrase used to refer to Jesus in Mark.

Jesus uses it to refer to himself in 10:45 for instance.

He uses it again in 2:10 and 14:62 as he teaches that he is more than a normal human and is the Messiah.

What did the “son of man” come to do?

A) Bear Authority

-He taught with authority (1:22)

-He casts out demons. Evil spirits obey him. (1:27, 3:15, 6:7)

-He has the authority to forgive sins (2:10)

-He has the authority to be the Lord of the Sabbath (2:28)

B) Suffer

-He taught he must suffer much and be rejected (Mark 9:12)

-At the Last Supper he tells the disciples what has been written about him must happen (14:21)

-He was to be betrayed into the hands of sinners (14:41)

-Mark 8:31

-Mark 9:31

C) Return to Judge

-Promises to rise from the dead (8:31, 9:9, 9:31, 10:34)

-Promises to return (8:38, 13:26, 14:62)

-Jesus knows who he is

In Mark’s Gospel, Jesus knows who he is

1) He is David’s greater son [Uses Psalm 110 to teach about himself. CF with Mark 12:36, 14:62]

2) He is the suffering servant [Uses Isaiah 53 to teach about himself. CF specifically with 10:45 and above passages]

3) He is the one who will come again to bring judgment [Uses Daniel 7:13-14 to teach about himself. CF with 8:38,13:26,14:62)

This is Mark’s teaching about Jesus: God came in the flesh, was rejected, and will come again in judgment.

What about Jesus and You?

At the very beginning of the book Mark writes about the gospel, the good news. 1:1

What is the good news?

For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:45.

Referencing Isaiah 53, Jesus teaches that he was God come in the flesh both to be rejected by people and to give his life as a ransom for all those who would repent of their sins and believe in him.

What we can learn from Peter

Jesus laying down his life as a ransom was good news for Peter. Throughout the gospel we see that Peter leads the disciples in confusion, confession, cowardly denials, and bold promises. In chapter 14 we see Peter’s three-fold denial of Jesus, BUT, we also see Peter’s weeping (v. 72). In these tears we can see hope.

Repentance begins with realizing the weight of your sins and the greatness of your need. It can come like a thunderclap. Then it can cause showers of weeping. If it is godly sorrow, it brings change.

If you want to see Jesus for who He is, you must see yourself for who you are. And if you are seeing clearly, you will weep.

May god give us eyes to see the truth about ourselves, and then the truth about Jesus who came to lay down his life as a ransom for many as we teach this book. This was the good news for Peter, and it is the good news for us too.

Steps for Inductive Bible Study

Steps for IBS: Observation, Interpretation, Application

By Ben Durbin in Leadership Cell

Step 1: Begin with prayer

Step 2: Identify context

What goes with the text

Look at the surrounding verses, chapters, book

Step 3: Look for the obvious

Write out obvious facts, details, or ideas

Observation Questions:

Who is the audience, the author, the main characters

What are the main events? What is the major idea? What are the people like? What does he talk about most.

When was this written? When did it take place? When was it received?

Where did this event occur

Why was it written? Why did he say that, go there, or respond that way? Why is so much or so little space given to a topic.

How did this happen? How is it done? How is this truth illustrated

Step 4: Meditate on the passage and observations and pray some more

Step 5: Identify key words (anything used multiple times), topic, or theme

Step 6: Keep in mind a few rules of interpretation

Seek the full teaching of God's word for any topic you find. (e.g. -- the bible has a lot to say about prayer)

Interpret Scripture with Scripture (Start with the author's writings, and expand out)

Remember: The New Testament interprets the Old

That which is said multiple times interprets that only said once

Clear interprets unclear

Does what you are concluding fit into the whole of the Bible? Does it reject teaching of the Bible--if so, try again. Meditate on it. Work it out.

Follow the literal sense. You typically want to go with the "obvious" meaning and not a "hidden" message

Look for the authors intended meaning

Step 7: Make your interpretation (only 1)

How was this relevant to the original audience?

What are the key words phrases, or themes

What was the author's purpose of intent

What are the key truths/and or principles

What is the TIMELESS truth!!

Does your interpretation fit within the context of THIS passage

Does your interpretation harmonize with the whole scripture

Step 8: Check your conclusions using reliable study aides

Concordance -- cross references / parallel passages

Bible Dictionary -- word definitions and meanings

Commentaries --- input from professional students of God's Word

Bible foot-notes -- study bibles can include all of the above

Step 9: Make your application(s)

Tip 1: Start with your discovery of God's word

Tip 2: Accept God's truth and work it out into daily living

Tip 3: Be Specific: application must be personal and measurable to each individuals life.

Tip 4: Practice: maturity isn't measured by how much we know, but by how much we actually live out.

The application questions

How did this message apply to the original audience?

What are the similarities between us and them?

How does the meaning of the passage apply to me?

What are the theological principles of the passage?

What truth(s) am I to embrace, believe, or order my life by?

What changes should I make in my belief, in my life?

How can I practice what I have learned from this passage everyday?

Step 10: Pray before you share